Volume 2
The Winds of Change - February 2007
The last month has just flown past, quite literally, with gale force winds from the South West which had roof slates and broken trees branches actually flying past the house.
During the height of the storm a huge uprooted tree careered down the loch and carried away a large section of my jetty leaving it beached about 1,000 feet further down the loch. I have still to work out how to get this bulky and heavy object back onto its concrete plinths but, that aside, we were indeed lucky.
Last month I mentioned, with a degree of optimism, my forthcoming hospital visit. Well, it has come and gone and the surgeons told me, without hesitation or prevarication, that my retina is damaged beyond repair and as a consequence there is no chance of me ever seeing again - all in all a somewhat depressing prospect don't you think? One thing I find difficult to understand, no, damn it, impossible to understand, is the fact that I am told my cornea graft is in excellent condition, my eye pressure normal but I am also told that my retina is now so badly scarred that I am condemned to a life of total darkness. It seems all very sudden. It was not so long ago when I first met my surgeon in hospital and we discussed the book I was then reading. It was a biography of Mary Queen of Scots. I suppose, all said and done, I only lost my sight, she lost her head! Facing up to the inevitable has certainly called for a reassessment of my position - past, present and future. My family and friends tell me that I am the same person and in conversation they never think of me as being blind; so in that respect I am grateful and very fortunate. I must however accept that my blindness has deprived me of at least 70% of my perception and this disadvantage manifests itself at its greatest in large receptions or occasions involving company. This shortcoming would be minimised by me accepting that my loss of awareness is a reality, but not a weakness. Otherwise I would become an all-round bore - and that will never do!
I was telling my computer about quite a pleasant experience I had a few days ago. It came in the form of a note from a friend who received a letter, and throwing aside all modesty,(false or otherwise), and with the only excuse being to restore, in part, my damaged ego, I will quote the letter almost verbatim. "I will leave others to comment upon Allan Campbell Fraser's contribution to industry and commerce, his services on behalf of Central and Local Government and the public in general but, for my part, I would like to draw attention to one of the many charitable organisations he has helped which I am the present Chairman. Allan was responsible for setting up a funding arrangement which has resulted in an annual grant for the past 20 years. This money has been put to good use in giving respite care in the community. I understand this is only one of the many donations arising from his unsung charitable involvement and in fact I am aware of another local charity that may be about to become a beneficiary arising from Allan's involvement." I make no apologies for mentioning this. It is in line with my efforts towards regaining some lost self-esteem; although, I am only too aware of my humble endeavours compared to the tremendous effort of those in the voluntary sector. I think the Cowal area is particularly fortunate in having so many prepared to give up so much of their time to serve others. Maybe we will see a nationwide awakening soon, and realisation that big government is bad government and a culture based on rights and no obligations leads inevitably to an uncaring selfish society. Maybe the powers that be will begin to recognise the powerful good of the voluntary sector, working quietly amongst us, carrying out so much unpaid community and social work. Who knows? - The beneficial effects of encouraging the untapped energy of our youth into voluntary services could alter the present culture that leads to their disinvolvement with society.
My computer interrupted me saying “I am sorry, sir (I get nervous when he calls me ‘sir’), I am your computer and must print out what you say. You have often told me that I have no feelings, no opinions or can have no thoughts of my own and that I am a logical and unemotional machine. That may be so, but I have access through Internet to all the facts and figures available and, with all respect, if you would pardon the pun, but I think you are ‘whistling in the dark.’ The word on the Web statistically shows that you are living in a sick, selfish, self-satisfied, smug society, a disease that is contagious and has worked its way down to the point where it has become part of the British character, and manifests itself in many ways. It will be hard to change the culture that encourages the attitude of a society bred from the generation whose first thoughts are: ‘what is in it for me, what can I get away with’, ‘I am not responsible’, ‘it is someone else's fault’, ‘it was not me but if it was then it was not my mistake and if is was and is or it is not, there's always litigation if need be.”’ I said to him, “You have been particularly quiet recently. I should have known that something was boiling up inside you. Now that you have got it off your chest I would like to move on now, if you do not mind.”
Last month I described some circumstances that allow the blind to have a friendly laugh at the expense of the sighted.
Here is another incident:- Tapping my way through the village yesterday I came alongside a man who said, “Good morning. I know you are blind and I was holding my breath back there, fearing you were about to walk into that lamppost. Luckily your stick made contact with it.” I said, “Yes. Thank you. By the way who am I speaking to?” He said, “I am Bill. You will recognise me because I am the one who has a beard.”
I am told the following story is true, but I doubt it. A blind man with his guide dog exited Byres Road Underground in Glasgow. He waited until he heard someone passing and asked for directions to the Botanic Gardens. A female voice said, “Of course," and then bent down and said loudly and slowly to the dog, “Take him across the road, turn right and then straight up until you get to the traffic lights at Great Western Road then cross the road when the lights turn green, (remember green), then turn him left for about 10 yards then turn him right and he should be at the main gates. Good dog - bye bye.” You have to see the funny side of life!
Mark, my mobility officer will spend some time this week familiarising me with the kitchen. Dammit! When I could see I had little knowledge of the kitchen; its pots and pans, its oven and hob, and other things which I think go under the general name of ‘white goods’. No one need expect from me Lobster Thermidor with Montrachet or Steak Diane washed down with a fine Claret, but I will settle for tea and buttered toast.
I have just remembered, I am still waiting to hear from the guide dog people. I intended this month to update you on the new programs for a voice-activated computer systems, it will have to wait because I have still to establish the interplay with the new Microsoft Windows © system.
posted @16:24:51 1st February 2007 -Winds of Change